Archives for NLP
Do you drink coffee? Have you ever tried to stop?
Me neither. I like coffee.
But what about getting up early? Have you ever tried waking up early? How did it go?
That was a challenge for me. I used to dread getting up early – especially for work!
I mean 40 hours a week working in a job you don’t enjoy… who the heck wants to do that?
But nowadays I love getting up early. Yeah, you heard me… I absolutely love it!
It’s so much fun to be up before the sun rise. It feels like I have a head start over everyone else… like I have some sort of secret that nobody else knows about – and if you “get” what I’m going to share with you by the end of this article – you’ll know the secret too ;)
Would you like to hear it?
I’m sure you would. But first let me explain something important. There are two different ways you can get up in the morning.
In my personal opinion, this is the more difficult of the two. It’s like pulling teeth, but you would be surprised how many people still use it. I used it for 28 years because I didn’t know any better because I thought that was how everybody woke up!
Here’s how it goes. As soon as you hear your alarm or start to wake, you either press snooze or turn off your alarm. Then after what seems like an eternity you get this negative feeling in your gut… similar to a feeling you may have had in before when you were late (or almost late) for work. As this feeling starts to intensify, you begin to make pictures of being late for work – and worse – your boss yelling at you. Then when the feeling is strong enough, you scare yourself awake and jump out of bed.
That’s how most people wake up. This strategy works well because it is a moving away from strategy. When you move away from negative feelings you are waking up with this strategy. That’s what motivates a lot of people to get out of bed – that negative vibe.
But there is a much better way. The second strategy is my preference and one I’ve been using for the past 5 some years without missing a beat. Would you like to know it?
I thought you would.
Strategy #2: Click here to read more…
My wife and I were chatting this morning. She decided to sleep in this morning instead of getting out of bed and going to the gym – nothing wrong with that, but after our conversation I learned something really valuable about how she motivates herself to go to the gym and exercise.
She told me that she woke up this morning and *pictured* herself at the gym doing her workout. She made the picture big and bright, but that wasn’t enough to get her out of bed. The picture wasn’t enough to motivate her.
But I know my wife very well. There are times when she is very excited to go to the gym. So I got curious and asked,
“What does get you excited about the gym?”
And she said, “When I focus on how the *feeling* I have after the gym – after my workout and even the next day. I feel like a gladiator!”
As she said those words she started flexing like a real gladiator… she looked pumped up and excited.
So in a nutshell, my wife’s strategy for getting motivated to workout and go to the gym is to focus on the feeling she has after her workout.
“That’s interesting,” I thought. Click here to read more…
November 16, 2009 | 204 Comments
Don’t you just love it, when you tell someone you’re going to do something that’s never been done before and they say, “You can’t do that!” And then somehow that idea seem to stick in your head, playing over and over again.
Know what I mean?
How to Deal With Negative People (and their Negative Thoughts)
The real trick is recognize what I call your conditioned response. You see, sometimes another person will say something and that triggers the PLAY button to one of a million mental programs. This isn’t true for everyone, but you might want to take this little test first to be sure.
Here’s the video:
Sometimes we don’t recognize fear for what it really is. We give it other disguises and names like self-sabotage, procrastination or just being plain lazy. But if you dig deeper to those dark layers we all have, you realize that your resistance is based in fear.
To overcome your fear you’ve got to start by recognizing fear for what it really is.
#1. Recognize What Fear Is and Is Not
Realize that there is only one moment and that moment is n-o-w. If you really take the time to dissect and look at your fear, you’ll see something completely obvious. Fear is not something that is happening now, it’s something that you’ve predicted to happen in the future. Here’s a quick excerpt I picked up from the definition of fear in Wikipedia:
“Fear always relates to future events, such as worsening of a situation, or continuation of a situation that is unacceptable.”
You could say that fear is how you feel (emotionally) about something that hasn’t even happened yet. Isn’t that interesting? It’s not something that is happening n-o-w, but something you expect to happen. And that expectation builds the feeling of fear.
Now I wouldn’t put all fears in this category. If you’re in the North American Rockies and you run into a grizzly bear, you’d be afraid. I’d be afraid too. You didn’t make up the grizzly bear in your head, it’s sitting right there in front of you.
But back to my point. There is only one of two places your fear can come from: either internal memories or external images in the n-o-w. I’d say 99% of those images are self created, internal images.
#2. Are you proactive or re-active?
The neighbors dog always barks at the mail man. He’s been doing that for the past two years. The problem is that the neighbors dog is a huge German Sheppard so half the neighborhood can hear him.
What’s really interesting is that this German Sheppard is a real big baby. You’d think he was all tough the way he barks behind that fence, but my experience tells me another story.
Just the other day something really interesting happened. I was outside and I heard him barking behind the fence. He couldn’t see me and I couldn’t see him. I’m not quite sure, but I thought maybe he heard me or smelt me and that set off his barking. But still, this dog knows me very well so it was odd to hear him barking at me.
A few minutes later the neighbor let him out and as soon as the German Sheppard saw me – he stopped barking. As I saw him calm down I went up to see him. His eyes were are glazed over like he just saw a ghost. Poor guy, I wonder what sort of pictures he was putting in his head? Something scared the beejeezus out of him – and obviously, it wasn’t me.
But we do the same thing, don’t we?
We think of an unlikely future situation, something that hasn’t even happened yet; and then we play it over and over again in our minds, scaring ourselves silly.
You could just as easily play a funny image over and over again and make yourself laugh hysterically…. but we don’t seem to do that.
#3. You Can Eliminate Fear in Less Than 60 Minutes Click here to read more…
November 4, 2009 | 460 Comments
Have you ever started a new project where you were really excited and the people in your life could sense your enthusiasm?
You were completely inspired and motivated. Things couldn’t be better – you felt like this was what you were meant to be doing.
Then “WHAM-O,” you hit a brick wall. Something you didn’t expect.
Maybe you had an argument with someone special in your life or you just had a bad day, and for some reason that set everything off course.
Then as you thought of ways to get back on track – to get things going again, you heard that little voice in your head say, “Maybe you shouldn’t be doing this. Maybe this is a sign.”
And the more you listened to that little voice, the more you began to believe it – maybe the voice is right!
Know what I mean?
One of the biggest personal challenges I’ve had to face in almost everything I’ve accomplished from becoming a coach, keeping my blog going and even proposing to my wife – has been to effectively wash out that little voice, so that I could do what I thought was right for me.
If there is one obstacle that is a dream killer, it’s that little voice. It can take your big dreams and crush them…. unless you know the right technique to overcome these negative thoughts quickly.
This very powerful technique is something you won’t find anywhere else. It’s something I’ve been using for quite a while with great success. Have a look:
Click here to read more…
95% of people DO NOT know this secret
If you have tried affirmations without success then you’ll want to know WHY.
It’s no secret really.Â You just have to understand how thoughts manifest themselves.Â If you want a new thought in the form of an affirmation or visualization to stick, then it must include these 3 specific elements.Â These elements were written about in Maxwell Malt’s 40-year classic, Psycho-Cybernetics.
In Maltz’s book he says,
“The reason it (a thought) would remain with us rather than just bounce off like water off a duck’s back is what I view as self-image imprinting.Â This is most controlled by three factors: authoritative source, intensity and repetition.”
It makes sense that an affirmation that is intense and repeated often enough will begin to manifest, right?
Not exactly. Â If you stick with the repetition alone then you have a less than 30% chance of getting affirmations to work for you.
Let me explain.
Your Internal Sequence
The most important part of affirmations is that you get the feeling – the vibration.Â If you affirm the words, “I am abundant,” and you don’t feel those words, the vibe of them – then you’re wasting your time.Â It’s not going to elicit the Law of Attraction in your favor.
Part of the reason that affirmations don’t work is because of poor training and exercises.Â For example: how many times have you done sit ups and gotten a six pack?
The exercises are important, but what’s even more important is the training on how to do those exercises.
The reason that most people don’t “get” affirmations is because they don’t understand their own neurology.Â They don’t understand how their brain works.
You see your brain fires off thoughts in sequences. Â And if you fire the right sequence then you trigger the right emotions.Â Â And since the whole purpose of an affirmation is to trigger the way you feel, it’s absolutely critical you know your strategy – the sequence ofÂ auditory, visual and kinesthetic experiences that puts you into an emotional state.
Why Affirmations Don’t Work Click here to read more…
In this video of Anthony Robbins book Unlimited Power I’ll share an NLP technique that helped Tony skyrocket his career and cure a woman of a snake phobia within 1 hour. I’ll also share a technique that you can use right away to help you get motivated and increase what Tony calls your, “personal power.”
Here’s the video:
Fast Change Enthusiast,
Steve Click here to read more…
I’ll be honest with you. You can’t make someone do something they don’t want to do, but what you can do is use my lie-detector test to see if someone is telling you the truth or not. It’s really easy to do and once you get the hang of it, you’ll start to learn a lot about others.
Here’s my video:
Click here to read more…
This is the third of three insights I have had on creative visualization. The first of which had a big part in helping me grow out of my job. You can go back and read the first two articles here: Creative Visualization Insight #1 and Creative Visualization Insight #2.
Remember that ‘feeling’ provides the fuel for your visualization. Those internal feelings are an indication of your vibration. And it’s the vibration that sets up your attractive forces using the Law of Attraction.
There are a few ways to trigger your feelings during visualization. The method I’ll share with you here requires a little more background on your nervous system.
Your Nervous System
If you think about it, we’re always interpreting the world through our five senses: auditory, visual, kinesthetic, smell and taste.
For example, a person who is primarily visual/sight oriented might say:
“I don’t see that?”
“What does it look like?”
“Did she show you?”
“I can’t picture that.”
A person who is primarily kinesthetic/feeling might say:
“Can we touch base?”
“Money is tight.”
“I’ve got this bad feeling.”
A person who is primarily auditory/sound might say:
“Did you hear that?”
“Are you listening to me?”
“That sounds interesting.”
In each situation above, the individual used a different part of their nervous system to communicate their message. The words we use are an indication of how we’re accessing our nervous system at any moment in time.
Creative Visualization Insight #3: Strategy
One way to develop strong internal feelings during visualization is by understanding your strategy. Think of your strategy as a sequence of numbers used to open a combination lock (ie. 4-28-15)
In order to open the lock, you need to know theÂ sequence of the numbers as well as the value of
each number. There are two parts to every strategy:
Part 1: The Sequence (order of numbers)
Part 2: Sub-Modalities (the value of each number)
Your strategy comes to you through your five senses.
Get the right strategy and get the right feeling. The problem is that most people don’t know what strategy works best for them.
Part 1: The Sequence Click here to read more…
This exercise is so much fun. It’s been over 2 years since I completed my NLP practitioner, but I’ve got to say that once you practice this visualization – it gets much easier. Repetition is the mother of learning.
As I point out in the video, it’s easy for me to pull up images of loved ones in a snap – and you can too – if you practice visualizing them through your own eyes.
If you have any questions, you know what to do – speak your mind!